The Bible of Brian

The Bible of Brian is a Satanic book created by Brian Jones. It talks about his ressurection in 1969, and how much his bud, Mick, is a cunt for not going to his funeral.

Context
the bible of Brian talks about the life of a boy, Brian Jones, who became an extreme satan worshiper at the age of 16. He joined a band, the rolling stones, and after a while of being in the band, the band members had enough of his Zozo bullshit and drowned him in a backyard pool in an effort to make him stop being so unholy. It didn't quite work. He drowned and passed away, and after 2 months dead and finding out all the secrets of satan, he ressurected and called Mick Jagger out for being a bitchass motherfucker who didn't go to his funeral. He gave Jagger 98 years left to live looking like a dehydrated gecko, made Bill Wyman known as a pedophile, and he didn't do anything to Charlie Watts because Charlie was good the entire time. Brian decided during these times of his ressurection to make everyone he could worship him for millions of years, until the world comes to a complete end.

The victims of his worship curse
The victims of his worship curse are people who have an extreme attractiveness towards Brian, and ignore the fact he spent years into satan worship and beating his significant others. They would do anything to protect the Jones name, and make shrines dedicated to Jones.

The people not phased by the worship curse
these lucky people are the small group of Zalists, content with their lord Zal Yanovsky. They cannot be tricked into worshiping Brian (or his bible) calling them a fake lord and a fraud.